The cabinet is earth-colored, as if it was planted directly from the ground in the room. On its surface, thorny tendrils twist and turn, creating a pattern of prickly leaves that add to its mysterious appearance. Hidden among the thorny stems are small, few red rose petals, which stand out while emitting a sweet scent yet hinting at mystery. The roses, with their strong stems, fight for their existence among the thorns, reflecting the struggle between beauty and pain.
The cabinet evokes feelings of fear and pain, as if it carries within it dark memories of the past. Yet alongside this, it also instills a sense of hope and desire for change, like flowers blooming from pain. Its presence in the room creates tension, with the promise of something new that can grow from the darkness. Every glance at it invites the observer to ponder the contrast between pain and beauty, and the potential for change that can occur from difficulties.

When you open the doors, you see three neatly arranged shelves, each emanating a different atmosphere.
Top Shelf: On this shelf, there are stunning items – colorful and new clothes, books with shiny covers, and photos from journeys you've taken. You see a white shirt you just bought, a book about exciting experiences, and a picture of smiling friends during a trip. When you touch these items, you feel warmth in your heart, as if you are returning to moments filled with joy. This shelf reminds you of the good in life.
Middle Shelf: This shelf holds a mix of experiences – there are old toys, books that have been kept but not touched for a long time, and even a few items that evoke mixed emotions. You see a stuffed animal you received as a gift, but it also carries a memory of a difficult day. Here and there are also items like movie tickets or drawings that tell a story of moments that were enjoyable, yet also challenging. When you open this shelf, you feel as if you are walking between two worlds – a richness of emotions, but also confusion. You hesitate over which items to keep and which you can set aside.
Bottom Shelf: This shelf is heavier. When you open it, a smell of dust wafts up. There are old and torn clothes, forgotten items, and various memories that you would prefer to forget. There are blurred photos, broken records, and books with torn pages. When you touch these items, you feel pressure overwhelming you – each item tells a story of pain, discomfort, or trauma. This shelf reminds you of the difficulties you faced – moments that left a deep mark.

When the EMDR therapist sits with you, they ask you to choose one item from the bottom shelf. You focus on it, and their voice guides you to feel the emotions that the items evoke. They ask you to describe what you see, feel, and experience while they provide you with eye movements or other stimuli.
The EMDR process helps you address difficult emotions and memories. As you focus on an item from the bottom shelf, you feel the emotions associated with it, like pain or fear. The therapist asks you to describe these feelings, allowing you to connect with your experiences. With the help of eye movements or other stimuli, your brain works on processing the emotions and releasing the pain associated with the memories.
A New Experience During the process, you begin to see these experiences in a new light. Instead of the painful memories affecting you, they become part of your journey. As you release the pressures, you feel relief. Ultimately, this process helps you experience better moments and build trust in yourself, allowing you to move forward and feel more whole.
Ending the Process: After several sessions, the cabinet becomes filled with new experiences. When you open the bottom shelf, it’s hard to feel the pain that was once there. You learn to distinguish between what is important to preserve and what can be released. Now you have much more control over what you want to keep; this is your cabinet, full of experiences – some good and some challenging, but you know they are just part of your journey.
The Private Sexuality Cabinet

When a patient avoids entering their sexuality cabinet, they are essentially choosing avoidance as a way to deal with the complex matters contained within. Avoidance may feel like a safe and comfortable solution, but it can also block them from many significant experiences that could promote personal growth and healthy intimacy.
During the EMDR process, focusing on items from the bottom shelf may feel threatening, and the patient may fear the emotions or memories that may arise. However, it's important to understand that this processing is part of the journey. It allows them to transform pain and fear into manageable experiences rather than experiences that control them.
After several meetings with EMDR, they may begin to see changes in their thought and emotional patterns. They may understand that the painful experiences do not define them; rather, they are merely part of their journey. They will learn to release the stigma they placed on their sexuality and begin to feel more secure and comfortable in this space.
Imagine your cabinet of sexual experiences, unique and special. This cabinet reflects your personal journey in intimacy, filled with items that symbolize moments, emotions, and lessons that have accumulated over time.
Top Shelf: At the top of the cabinet, you see a well-lit shelf, filled with items that evoke warmth and comfort. There are pictures of intimate moments with partners, romantic letters, and items that remind you of pleasant sexual adventures. There’s a dress that tells the story of a magical evening, and perhaps books on healthy sexuality. When you open this shelf, you feel a strong connection – it’s a celebration of love, desire, and positive experiences.
Middle Shelf: The middle shelf is a bit more complex. There are items that symbolize mixed experiences – positive experiences alongside challenging moments. Perhaps there are play accessories, books with tips and guidance, and pictures of moments that prompted you to think about different experiences. Here and there, you might find items that remind you of uncomfortable experiences or difficulties you’ve gone through – perhaps a note left by a partner, or a reminder of a moment that wasn’t pleasant. When you open this shelf, you might feel confusion – there are experiences you want to remember and those you prefer to forget.
Bottom Shelf: This shelf is the heaviest. It contains items related to difficult or traumatic experiences – memories of abuse, pain, or experiences that were unpleasant. There may be reminders of toxic relationships, items that evoke difficult emotions, or memories you wouldn’t want to relive. When you open this shelf, you feel pressure and difficulty rising – each item carries with it a story from the past.
The Organizing Process with the Guide: During the work with an EMDR therapist, you are asked to select an item from the bottom shelf. The guide helps you focus on this item and identify the feelings it evokes in you. They guide you through this complex process, where you move from a state of pain toward release and understanding. This is a process of processing emotions, memories, and pain, which allows you to discover new aspects of your intimacy.
Ending the Process: After several sessions, the cabinet begins to change. The bottom shelf is no longer as frightening as it once was. You start to understand that these experiences are part of your journey, but not what defines you. You succeed in discovering what is important to keep and what can be released. Now, when you open the cabinet, it is no longer intimidating – it reflects all your experiences, including the pain, but also your ability to grow, learn, and evolve.

The Top Shelf is an Important Part of the Process:
The top shelf in the EMDR process refers to positive emotions, good experiences, and pleasant memories. During therapy, the therapist may ask you to think about items or memories from the top shelf to balance the difficult emotions you experience from the bottom shelf. Here’s how the top shelf helps the process:
Strengthening Positive Emotions: When you focus on good memories or positive experiences, it can help elevate your mood and provide you with inner strength. It can remind you that life includes good things too, not just challenges.
Emotional Balance: The top shelf helps balance the pain and difficulty from the bottom shelf. When you reminisce and remind yourself of pleasant experiences, it may reduce emotional overload and give you a sense of comfort and security.
Improving Perspective: When you integrate experiences from the top shelf with work on the bottom shelf, you start to see the full picture of your life, not just the difficulties. It helps you understand that your past includes good things as well, which gives you hope for the future.
Ultimately, the top shelf is an important tool in the EMDR process that allows you to cope with pain in a healthier way and build upon positive experiences.
You are invited to the clinic for your personal journey.
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